Age Blogs and Age Stories - AgeMatch.com > Litenbrite's blogs > WOULD BE INTERESTING
WOULD BE INTERESTING Sort by:
Author
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Tue, Sep 20, 2011 12:06

It would be interesting to hear when and why you have an Age gap Preference, Lets share our stories.  Even if you have this preference for no reason at all...and its just who you really are.         ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​    Mine is that I have so much more in common with younger people, and even my girl friends are younger or Women that also are very youthful and prefer younger Men. But this didn't start until I was in my thirties. So when did your preference start?       ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​        ​   I do ask that none of your comments contain Explicit material as this might be upsetting to some people.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
jag6000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 288
Posted on Sun, Oct 23, 2011 06:58

Claudia there's no real connection between 'personal motivation',to engage in such a relationship,and 'the results'of our pursuit of it.Those 'results' aren't just dependent on how we pursue things and are more dependent on the ideas,feelings,and acceptance or rejection towards us by the other person. Finding the right person,who ticks all the boxes,is probably more a matter of fate and our lives are pre destined as to wether we're going to be lucky or not.In that case it's probably not really a case of the 'results',in our pursuit of it,at all. That seems to be confirmed by the fact that most blokes, who are looking for,or who'd be interested in,a large age gap OM/YW relationship,probably have similar,if not the same,motives for looking for one (ie the physical and personality attractions and the child bearing/rearing abilities of a much younger girl as opposed to an older woman of our own age).It's obvious in that case that the search criterea would be for a young girl in her teens or 20's who's aim in life is to be a young wife and mother who doesn't have any age hang ups in her search criterea about the type of bloke who she chooses for that.Just like Nicola Philpot. However the 'results' in our 'pursuit' of that are very different for some than for others and luck/fate,(together with that issue of 'social proof',in the case of married/seperated/divorced/in a relationship blokes,winning out over single ones),seems to be the biggest factor in determining those 'results'.


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Claudia2000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 124
Posted on Sat, Oct 22, 2011 17:46

Hello everyone! I was reading your latest posts and it was amazing to see that the contributions this blog has received are so many and so varied. This really turned out to be a very interesting blog. Thanks for posting it Litenbrite. I have to say that I'm really surprised and confused... I thought the reasons to have an "age gap" preference were something most people would view in a similar way. I was obviously wrong. Aside from the social and psychological approach to the subject, what I'm intrigued by is how our personal motiviation to engage in such kind of relationship impacts the results in our pursuit of it. Any ideas?


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Searching2007
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 146
Posted on Sun, Oct 16, 2011 14:28

As said before,I have a preference for younger women,because I hope to eventually have children.


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
jag6000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 288
Posted on Tue, Oct 04, 2011 05:11

Litenbrite that's eactly the point which I was making with the reference to temperament/personality.But that criterea is different to the age thing in every respect.My mum's temperament,for example, is something that she's always had from when she grew up. However Claudia seemed to be saying that even though she's had second thoughts about the age thing and the connection with looking for a replacement father figure she still seemed to be making a connection with older age in some way being 'associated' as a factor,in deciding the type of personality/temperament/'qualities', which a person might or might not have ?. You then also seemd to be saying something similar by referring to the possibility that having a young mother,in my case,would then probably explain why I'm looking for a relatively younger woman in a relationship/marriage ?.Which again seems to make the age thing important by your reading of Carl Jung's ideas ?. The fact is I've known some women of around my own age and some older women who've got better personalities and temperaments than some of the other younger women that I've known.I've also known some younger women who've got better personalities and temperaments than some of the women of my own age and older that I've known. Age itself isn't a factor whatsoever that is any deciding factor in the 'qualities' that a person has. The only exceptions are the type of general differences which apply in the case of when most girls are in their young teenaged years compared to later as they get older.Something like the young,carefree,naive Dianna Spencer before and when she started dating Prince Charles.Which is one of the things that I've always found attractive about young women.Although having said that the older feminist women seem to be removing those attractive,teenaged traits from the younger girls by indoctrinating them with their preferred ideas,of being serious minded,career girls,with the flawed ideas of same age or OW/YM marriage late in life.Whereas in Dianna's case she was just unlucky in finding a bloke who didn't appreciate who he'd been lucky enough to have found and pulled.In which case she'd have been better off if I could have met her and pulled her instead. Which just proves that there are always exceptions which prove every rule such as the case I'v made for OM/YW relationships being better than same/close age ones or OW/YM ones. However having said all that like Claudia I've been doing some thinking but unlike her I haven't reached a conclusion yet.I think that there's a question contained in what I've explained above. I don't think that a bloke who would have been happy in a same age relationship,but with the proviso that it started at a young age, so as to get the benefit of at least having the pleasure of everything he finds attractive about a girl at that age,just once in life,is the same thing at all as having 'a preference' only for younger women. Such a 'preference' would,by definition,mean that a bloke would need to dump his wives as they age,on a regular basis,if it's just that type of preference that mattered to him and,just as in the case of the girl of around my own age who I wanted as a teenager, but lost out because she went for a large age gap relationship,with a bloke 30 years older than her,I'd be a liar and a hypocrite if I said that I would have turned Dianna Spencer down for example,if I'd have been lucky enough to have pulled her at that age,on the basis of my Dad's advice and my later thinking that it's better to have a much younger wife because women age faster. The conclusion in my case seems to be that it's not 'a preference' for a younger woman,but it's just that I feel that it's having the pleasure,of starting a relationship,with a girl while she's still young enough to have all those attractive qualities that she can only have at that age and who wants to start a family while she's young and therefore provide her children with a younger mother who'll hopefully be around for them for a long time to come and see her great grandchildren grow up,that's essential to me and it's worth just going without and calling it a day if that's not possible.Unluckily for me,unlike Joe Philpot,it looks like it's going to be a case of it being not possible.So the option of give up and call it a day seems like the only likely realistic one.

Available only
to logged in members

Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Mon, Oct 03, 2011 20:17

Jag, If you read my Blog you will see I said the same QUALITIES not the same age.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
jag6000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 288
Posted on Mon, Oct 03, 2011 06:14

Thanks Litenbrite. If Carl Jung was referring to age in that comparison then every girl would only go for a bloke the same age as her father and every bloke would only go for a woman the same age as his mother.Lol. My mum was around 25 when she had me but I've usually looked for girls in their teens preferably just as my Dad did when he started dating my mum.When I was a teenager that obviously started out as a same age preferance which then obviously became a preferance for younger women as I got older more by default than anything else simply because I was getting older but my search criterea remained the same but the level of rejection just meant I got nowhere anyway. However experience of life,together with my dad's advice,did result in the realisation later that same age relationships often fail because of the fact that women age faster than men.It's for that reason why I found out,when I was a bit older,that an OM/YW relationship is probably better than a same age one and that's probably what I'd prefer anyway. If Carl Jung was referring to some wierd connection being made between the parent/children type relationship and an eventual large age gap marriage,then,as I said,that idea really is barking up the wrong tree. That's not to say that 'some' age gap relationships aren't based on that type of criteria.However I think that any age gap relationship based on that type of reasoning is'nt right. If all that doesn't blow Carl Jung's ideas out of the water the fact that my grandmother had my dad,when my grandmother was in her 40's,but my dad started dating my mum,when my mum was in her teens,and my dad was in his mid 20's,probably will. Maybe Carl Jung was basing that comparison on personality/temperament not age.In which case it's probably not unusual for a bloke to look for a girl who's got a similar temperament to his mum and for a girl to look for a bloke who's got a similar temperament to her father.


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Mon, Oct 03, 2011 02:01

Hello Jag, Carl Jung said that we look for a someone that has the same qualities as for a man, their Mother, for a Woman their Father, or indeed someone that had a lot of influence on them ie, A Nanny. Or a Grandparent. when they were very young. If your Mum was very young when she had you it would account for your taste in Women. and I think Carl Jung was a genius. Of course Claudia is saying that she realised it was the QUALITIES that an older person had that attracted her. Nothing wrong with that at all. For you, or for Claudia. :))



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Thu, Sep 29, 2011 19:19

Helena, I think you just still have that very vitale and youthful energy, and also a sharp intellect, Younger men would find that perfect. and usually adore Women that know what they want :)) I believe your into Sport too. [the only one I am quite turned onto is Rugby,Where Men are Men, Lol!, but I havnt really got a team I support, because its not on TV much in the USA) Also you look like you are in your forties. All of that contributes to being a Younger Man Magnet.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Thu, Sep 29, 2011 18:57

Hello Claudia, You must have gone through many layers to come to that conclusion, and the easy one would have been that you were looking for a Father figure as you missed out on having yours around, But if it isnt quite the right conclusion you can kind of feel it in your bones, and until you look at things from a different perspective its then you find the real answers. Lovely having you on the blogs again:))



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
litenbrite Recommended
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 558
Posted on Thu, Sep 29, 2011 18:29

Hello Julie, Thank you for sharing your story, What you don't realize is the fact that you told it is inspiring someone else to overcome their shyness. and for so many people that is a big deal. There are many Young men that are very sincere about adoring a more mature woman, and very often they have wanted us since a young age, but because of pressures of others saying they shouldnt, repress their feelings. You do sometimes get Gigilo's and Scammers trying to take advantage, But you can figure out who they are. I would suggest at least answering to some of the e-mails and winks....because you never know. Happy Searching for someone nice.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
jag6000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 288
Posted on Thu, Sep 29, 2011 12:33

Claudia I think that idea of making any connection whatsoever between the loss in life of a parent/father and looking to date an older bloke is one of the worst reasons a girl can have for looking for an OM/YW relationship.If a girl told me that was her reasons for being with me then I'd probably walk away for both her benefit and mine. All of the thinking that I gave to the subject tells me that it can only really work out in the case of where a younger girl just sees dating/marrying a much older bloke in exactly the same way as most girls view dating a bloke of their own age would.If a girl sees an age gap relationship as a substitute Father thing then it's unlikely that can be reconciled as the basis for a good OM/YW relationship/marriage because the basis of both types of relationships are totally different. We only get two parents in life and when either or both have gone they're gone and it's no good looking on a dating site,for a date with an older bloke,hoping to find another Father.All that does is hurts those of us older blokes who are looking for a potential wife and the girl when she finds out that she can only ever really have one Father in life and a bloke,who sees her as a potential wife,not a daughter,can't provide her with the type of Father/Daughter relationship which her Dad would have done. Any girl who confuses looking for a Father figure and the type of 'qualities' of 'older age' in that case,with having a much older husband,is really barking up the wrong tree by looking for an OM/YW relationship. To put that into perspective it is possible for a girl to have a Father who's only 16 years older than her and a husband who is more than 30 years older than her.Which is an example that often freaks out the anti age lot who usually use the older than a girl's father issue in the case of older blokes looking for a much younger wife.Lol.


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
JulieAnn
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 2
Posted on Thu, Sep 29, 2011 08:46

I will also add my story, I was married twice, both marriages were to older men.  

The only one that even might be considered an age gap was the first one - my first husband was eleven years older that I am.  That marrage lasted for 15 years, but I am the one who brought it down - I was not happy in my early thirties being married to an older man, I went out looking for some excitement.  I had married when I was young, and felt that I was missing out on something.  I regret my foolishness to this day - he was a very good man and a good father to my children.

My second marriage came right after I left the first one, wham bam.  I loved my second husband very much but it was a much more difficult relationship - he was 6 years older than I am - not an age gap I don't think.  He turned out to be an alcoholic and died after twenty some years of marriage from liver failure.  I stayed with him through thick and thin, not sure if that was too bright or not - but I did.  I am glad that I had the privelge of being with him when he died.

Now that I am through the rough part of the grieving process and he has been gone for quite some time now I am looking for someone to share the rest of my life with.  I sometimes think my life is over, I have had the two relationships and it isn't looking too promising on the horizon to find another.  But I have joined this site and will continue to look.

I have had many younger men sending me winks and some mail, but I am not into younger men because I have spent most of my life with older men. I suppose I am going to have to get over that, because those seem to be the only men expressing any interest.  Something in me objects though, to taking what shows up on my plate, I would much rather go to the buffet and have whatever I like. 

 

 


Available only
to logged in members

Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Claudia2000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 124
Posted on Sun, Sep 25, 2011 03:55

Hello litenbrite! Wow, this is a very interesting question... Well, my story goes like this... My father died when I was just one year old. So, as I grew up, I noticed that when it came to relationships I was always drawn to men who were signigficantly older than me. I guess I'd always tried to make up for his absence. Lately I have been giving a lot of thinking to this subject, and I've arrived to the conclusion that it wasn't a man who were older than me what I'd been looking for all this time. I guess rather than that, what I had always wanted to find was a man who had the qualities that I associated with older age. Funny, huh? It only took me something like 20 years to find that out, lol. C'est la vie. :P


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
helena2006
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 366
Posted on Wed, Sep 21, 2011 13:38

For me?  There was no specific turn-on date.  I used to date men my own age in my late teens but when I married, it was a younger man.  Since then I have never dated or been interested in anyone my own age (nor have they been interested in me).  It is just a fact of life for me .....



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Follow - Email me when people comment