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Are You a Magic Seeker? Posted on Oct 26, 2011 at 08:50 AM
A lot of people refuse to believe that eating right and exercising is the key to feeling and looking fit. It seems too many people are looking for a magical formula, one that allows them to eat all the food they love and yet somehow have the best looking body possible. Are you searching for the “right fat burner” that will somehow, miraculously give you that fit body while still being able to eat your cakes, cookies, and ice cream? Are you looking for the “right exercises” that will magically make a certain body part look muscular and toned after just one session? Are you debating if you need to do your weight training in a full body workout style or a body part split? Are you overanalyzing about whether you should do weights first or cardio first? Are you trying to figure out if eating oatmeal is a better carbohydrate than brown rice? Here's a hint: there are no secret magical diet or exercise formulas! If you’re searching for magic, I feel sorry for you, because you’ll likely never reach your goals until you get real about being consistent, dedicated, and hard working--over a long period of time. If any magic happens, it’s when you do your workouts consistently, when you work HARD while working out, and when you eat right ALL OF THE TIME. And, regardless of all the exercising you do, you will not see any defined muscles, nor will you have that “toned” look, until you lower your bodyfat. If you want to see any magic happen, simply stop eating junk food for a few weeks, and you'll be amazed. Or you can follow the masses and keep searching, hoping, and praying for that magical potion to get you to where you want to be. You already know what you need to do, so stop eating the junk, and you won't be wondering where your results are because you will see them for yourself.
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Men and Women....If Posted on Oct 26, 2011 at 08:44 AM
If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a male chauvinist pig; if you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy. If you work too hard, there is never time for her; if you don’t work enough, you’re a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a boring, repetitive job with low pay, it’s exploitation; if you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your rear and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her, it’s favoritism; if she gets a job ahead of you, it’s equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it’s sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it’s male indifference. If you cry, you’re a wimp; if you don’t, you’re insensitive. If you make a decision without consulting her, you’re a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she’s a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something she doesn’t enjoy, that’s domination. If she asks you, it’s a favor. If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you are a pervert. If you don’t, you are gay. If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you are sexist. If you don’t, you are unromantic. If you try to keep yourself in shape, you are vain. If you don’t, you are a slob. If you buy her flowers, you are after something. If you don’t, you are not thoughtful. If you’re proud of your achievements, you are full of yourself. If you’re not, you have no ambition. If she has a headache, she is tired; if you have a headache, you are gay. If you want it too often, you are oversexed. If you don’t, you’re gay. --Gene Simmons Sex, Money, Kiss
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Workout Philosophy Posted on Oct 19, 2011 at 01:33 PM
When people ask me what it takes to be in good shape, I ask them what they're willing to do--BEFORE looking for results. If you’re gonna work out only occasionally, or if you have no grievances about skipping workouts, or if you think it's OK to exert little effort, or if you never turn down a piece of cake, then you’re fooling yourself by expecting to see the best results. I'm pretty convinced that if I started canceling workouts and eating everything that came along, I’d have minimal results--at best. I’ve learned over the past 6 years that BEING CONSISTENT is the most important part of achieving results. An aquaintence of mine who is slightly overweight asked me what she should do about getting in shape. My first instinct was to tell her what I do: work out with weights and cardio; eat only non-processed foods; and say no to eating all junk food and drinking alcohol. When I told her this she said, "Well, I hate the taste of healthy foods; I don’t have the time to be working out, and I love eating junk foods." Join the freakin’ club! If I had my choice, I’d rather be sitting on the couch eating chips! But I stick to the healthy lifestyle because I like how it feels to walk around looking exceptionally fit. I love being in shape, and I’m gonna do whatever it takes to stay there--even though it's hard as hell, and even though it’s not fun at all sacrificing all the tasty stuff. I eat the boring foods to have the ripped body. Being fit and strong is a great feeling! My co-worker isn't willing to go that far to get in shape--but I still totally respect her. It's all about how far a person is willing to go and knowing that the results will coincide accordingly. A person might make some improvements: smaller portions, minimizing beer and sweets, and even doing a little bit of exercise, but he knows that he won't be looking the best he possibly can anytime soon, so he should learn to be OK with that. The truth of the matter is, everyone has a different level of willingness. If eating junk everyday and swigging beers on the weekend are your biggest pleasures in life, and you don’t want to give them up, then don't!!! There's nothing wrong with that, but just don't ever bitch about your body looking kind of flabby. What is NOT respectable is when someone expects the best results possible and not doing any work and giving up nothing! I've had friends and family complain to me about their results--when they are drinking alcohol every weekend, eating candy bars every day, and dining on fast food. What the hell do they expect to see???? If you aren't doing what it takes, you have no grounds to complain about your lack of results. I think the biggest excuse for not working out (besides not liking it) is that there isn't enough time for it. Sorry, but I’m not buying it. Everyone is very busy, but fitting in a workout is just a matter of making it a priority. My neighbor has an awesome lawn, and I see him working in it every day. He’s also about at least 100 pounds overweight. He says he doesn't work out because he doesn't have the time. But he has the time to keep his yard beautiful! Not having the time is just an excuse! If he really wanted to be in shape, he would find the time, but being fit just isn't a priority for him. Everyone has different priorities. As long as he is happy, that is all that matters. My lawn looks like crap. I hardly work on it--and it shows. When I see people like my neighbor with such an amazing yard, I say, " I wish I had the time to make my yard look nice." The truth is, if having a nice yard was a priority, I would make the time, but I don't. But I do make working out a priority, and even at my busiest times, when all hell breaks loose, I WILL workout. Working out regularly is always a daily challenge for me, but some days are harder than others. Sometimes when I am really not feeling it at all and would rather just sit on the couch, I bribe myself with a reward: If I workout, then I’ll go buy a new book. I never use food rewards, because that would be a bit of a contradiction if I did. That would be similar to someone who quits smoking, and then to celebrate, goes out and smokes a few packs of cigarettes.
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For MEN Only: Quotes About Women and Dating Posted on Oct 14, 2011 at 08:44 AM
Well I figure it's time for a guy to step up and share some "manly" advice on this forum when it comes to dating women. Following are some quotes that I like. Read 'em and enjoy (or read 'em and weep if you don't like 'em). Quotes follow: My boyfriend used to ask his mother, 'How can I find the right woman for me?' and she would answer, 'Don't worry about finding the right woman- concentrate on becoming the right man.’ When a man goes on a date, he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows. --Frederick Ryder Respect is to women what looks are to men. A woman dating a man without respect is like a man dating a borderline ugly woman. --Brian Canigla As a rule when men talk to someone about a problem, they are looking for answers; women in general are different. They will talk to you about a problem to express how they feel. They usually aren't looking for answers; they just want to talk about it to straighten things out in their own minds. Unless she asks for advice, don't offer it. Just listen, and keep the conversation going. If she wants advice she will ask for it. --Gary Caine Women fall for bastards because they don't turn off the sexuality. "Nice guys” think women will be terrified of their sexuality, so they turn it off, but all they get is the “let’s just be friends” treatment. --Pook If a woman is attracted to you, and you give her a warm smile, the ice is already broken and you haven't even said a word. –Rico When you let a woman dominate your state of mind, you are giving up your manhood. --Senor Fingers There's a term that women use to describe men who are weak and display approval-seeking posture and mannerisms…that term is “NICE GUY”—David DeAngelo Never date a woman whose father calls her 'Princess.' Chances are she believes it. -- Anonymous Nobody is teaching boys how to be men; nobody is teaching them how to be in tune with their masculine nature. Mothers, try as they might, cannot do so adequately, because they don't know HOW to teach masculine nature, because their nature is feminine. With more boys being taught how to love by their mothers, they pick up the feminine nature. –Metal Fortress Never ask a female friend to hook you up with one of her friends. To a woman that’s pathetic. It implies that you are desperate, insecure and dependent. The key is not to ask for it, let her do it. --John Fate You must have something going for you. You must have at least one of the following: a solid hobby that challenges you physically and mentally, a musical talent that you enjoy, a good job, a good major in school that reflects your true life ambition, a super charismatic personality, etc. If you are nothing, you will attract nothing.
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HotProfDude's New PICS Posted on Oct 12, 2011 at 01:11 PM
Feel free to view my profile and feast your eyes upon my NEW PICS. And, yes, my sexy MILF's and Cougars: it feels WONDERFUL to age like fine wine. I'm 40 years old and believe that I look and feel better than ever.
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Ten truths I figured out this year Posted on Dec 24, 2008 at 08:56 AM
MERRY CHRISTMAS! :) Well, I haven't posted many blogs this fine year, so I thought I'd contribute a much-needed thought-provoking blog reflecting the trials and tribulations of life in 2008. Ten truths I learned in 2008: 1. Dont burn bridges. Especially with employers. 2. Take your job seriously or dont go!! The far-reaching implications of sub-par work cannot be overstated. A little sacrifice early on will pay dividends in the years to come. You cant undo a sh!tty reference!! 3. Dont borrow carelessly, Avoid credit cards, and LEARN TO LIVE ON A BUDGET!! Budgets create freedom, not prisons. 4. The next time I see a beautiful woman sitting by herself, I will remember that someone, somewhere, is sick of her sh!t. 5. Be careful who you screw. No, really. If you think it's a bad idea, it probably is. And condoms arent the miracle prophylactic. You never truly know the meaning of regret until you a) owe a sh!tload of money, or b) have an std. 6. Dont marry until you are over 30. You need to expose yourself to many different types of women. What you think you like isn't accurate until it's been proven through experience. 7. Learn the value and skill of networking. Make contacts and keep in touch, even if they may not benefit you anything. People can smell a mooch. 8. Do not give a woman your heart until you have spent considerable time qualifying her. You can't do this in a week. And you can't window-shop for good character. 9. People change on their own time, and on their own accord---if they change at all. Don't expect that anything you say or do will make a woman change for you. If it is truly intolerable then you should leave her. 10. Trust, but verify. Always. Everyone wants to make a buck, and most will screw you given the chance. Dont make the mistake of assuming people always have good intentions.
For MEN ONLY: 5 Dating Myths Posted on Aug 18, 2008 at 12:37 PM
I figured I'd post this to help some of you fellas out there. It seems to me that too many men lack balls and are willing to cater to every woman's need. Don't do it! Be a man. Text follows. 5 Dating Myths by Ron Louis & David Copeland Let's face it, dating sucks. It sucks to be rejected by hot and sexy babes, and it sucks to be alone. It sucks to be so nervous around a woman that you babble incoherently, and it is even worse to act like a stud and have her slap you in front of your buddies. So what is the solution? Get out, date, deal with the inevitable rejections, have fun, and learn about the machinery in your own head that leads to trouble and failure with women. When it comes to dating, most men are run by myths, misconceptions, and denial of their power as men. Understanding the myths and the solutions will leaves you free to flirt and date women, and more importantly create the sex life you have always wanted. I have listed a few dating myths that will begin to shed light on your most intimate dating troubles. These are complied from "How to Succeed With Women" - the best-selling book I co-wrote, published by Simon Shuster in 1998. So wake up, smell the coffee, pay attention, and you may just learn something. Even if you act like a know it all, we know the truth: YOU DON'T! You have bought into some of these myths and they have caused you trouble somewhere down the road. Myth #1 - You have to be a politician, millionaire, athlete, or blessed by god to get hot dates. Guys love to believe that they don't have what it takes to get laid. Most men use their lack of success as an excuse for not dating and pursuing the women they really want. These men blame the system, society, social issues, and economic realities for the lack of sex, not the man in the mirror. While being in a position of power or being a rock star will obviously get you a large pool of women to draw from, you too can get the hot women if you heed my advice. Here is the good news and the bad news. The good news: there are hot and sexy women available to you tonight. After personally surveying hundreds of women, most are looking for a man like you, a normal guy with normal desires and a normal job. The bad news: you have to work to get women. It won't happen by you staying home complaining about it. The point is that you have what it takes to get women when you understand what the game is. Repeat after me, "Dating is simply a numbers game." You flirt with x number of women and that will result in x number of conversations which will lead to x number of coffee dates which will lead to sleeping with x number. The work for you is to reduce what "x" is. To date means flirting with women and initiating conversations with women. Figure out the number ahead of time and then create a plan to go out and meet and talk to women. The process is simple if you are willing to create a step by step plan and follow it. Myth #2 - Just be nice and interesting enough and you'll get a woman. This is another horrible myth promoted by SNAGS (sensitive new age guys) and feminist men. Believing that being nice and interesting will work is one of the worst ideas promoted over the past 20 years. Do you really think women are looking for "nice" guys anyway? (The answer is an emphatic no.) The bottom line is that women want to be SEDUCED and ROMANCED. Most men think that if they like a woman, and she says that he is "sweet," "interesting," or "a wonderful friend," that he is moving the relationship towards romance and sex. This is dead wrong. The reason why is because women will either put you into the category of "friend" or "lover," but not both. When you are nice and interesting a woman will likely put you into the category of friend, but not lover. If you don't believe this, just look around at all the jerks who have sex with the hottest women. Women certainly are not having sex with these guys in every position imaginable because they are interesting, intellectually stimulating, and polite. No, these women are hot and heavy because these men are exciting, romantic, fun, and even a bit dangerous. The solution: don't give up being interesting and nice. That too would be a fatal error. The solution is to bring out other parts of your personality with a woman. Bring out the romantic part and let that guide you in sweeping a woman off her feet. Get into her shoes and figure out what would turn her on and excite her. If you find yourself spending time discussing fascinating topics, but not romantic ones, change the subject back to her beauty. Memorize poetry and whisper passages into her ear. If you tend to make the mistake of being a friend, focus your attention on romance and seduction and avoid the "fascinating" thoughts in your head. Myth #3 - Be a woman's therapist and you'll get laid. Along the same lines as being a nice and interesting guy, many men use the therapist ploy to attempt being lovers with a woman. We've seen this myth play out time and time again by desperate fools trying to get laid. The ploy usually works this way; a guy is friends with a woman he wants to date. He thinks that if she opens up to him emotionally then it will likely lead to sex. He thinks that if he can solve her emotional problems she will want to date him. Then, to his surprise, things pan out differently. Suddenly she starts to discuss every problem in her life with him. The guy thinks this is good and listens more and more and more to her complaints. In fact, he thinks that the more he listens to her, the better the chances are of her going to bed with him. She starts crying on his shoulder more frequently and even begins asking him to take her out for ice cream, expensive dinners, and even loan her money when she becomes too depressed to work. Now it turns ugly. She begins telling him about her problems with men. Our jr. therapist stays in the role of advice giver and a lowly "friend' to the woman. She dates the jerks and comes to him for advice. The solution: never be a therapist to a woman. Remember, you are either a lowly friend or a lover, not both. The most important thing in dealing with a woman is to make your romantic interests known right away so she thinks of you as a potential lover, not a friend. When you become a confidant to a woman she begins to associate you with her negative emotions and negative experiences putting you further out of the running for lover. If you are in this position with women right now, stop being the therapist today. You are wasting your time and avoiding being out in the world pursuing other women. Get out now while you still have a chance. Myth #4 - There is a limited number of available women. This is the type of myth promoted by babies disguised as men. This myth is promoted by men who can't get laid to save their lives and then search for lame reasons why. In fact, there is no evidence anywhere to back up this claim. Does the high percentage of divorce and affairs justify this myth? No. Does the high number of singles prove that this is indeed a fact? No. Does the large number of personals ads reflect this to be true? No. That is why it is called a myth and simply unfounded. Enough said. Myth #5 - You don't have what it takes to get laid. In their quietest moments, some men believe that there is something fundamentally wrong with them. They truly think some core part of themselves is fundamentally flawed. To this I say YOU ARE WRONG! It is every man's birthright to bed a woman. After studying this topic in an exhaustive fashion, I have noticed that the size of a man's belly or even the size of his IQ (not the size of his manhood) has no bearing on his ability to get women. I've seen fat men with models, short men with sexy 21 year olds, and guys so ugly that they looked like they were beaten with a bag of quarters, cuddling with hot and sexy babes. I won't bore you with stories about idiots. You can be a nerd with a pen protector and get tons of sex if you have the necessary confidence. No matter what you look like, women will want you if you demonstrate confidence and are out flirting and dating women. I recently saw an obese 45 year old guy flirting with every hot woman in a crowded bar. They stared into his eyes fascinated and turned on by his confidence and wit. He made no apologies for his size or his ugliness, and the women went for it. Once again it comes down to pursuing women. Just doing it. Here is a secret; many models complain that they can't get a date. Many claim that men are too scared to approach them because of their beauty. Be in the small cadre of studs who flirts with the women you are attracted to, and you will be miles above the pack. This is purely a numbers game. Once you begin flirting with 10-20 women per day you will quickly see results.
Is It OK for a Man To Hit a Woman Who Hit Him? Posted on Mar 19, 2008 at 04:53 PM
Discuss... Now, before anyone assumes anything about me, know that I am very content in my current relationship (see my blog entitled, "New Main GF, Pics") and have never hit my any of my GF's because I feel it's wrong for man to hit a woman unless his survival is at stake; however, I've talked to many guys, and it surprises me that the majority of them, indeed, advocate retalitation if a woman hits them first. Personally, I've never been hit by a woman because I'm 6'2, 230 lbs. (my ex-wife threw a 3-lb. bag of uncooked spaghetti at me once, but I just laughed so hard); but if a woman cold-cocked me, I'd not hit her; I would RESTRAIN her from further hitting me(if need be), but then I would just laugh because 1) it's just plain funny seeing a man hit by a woman, and b) I know that she's obviously very powerless to really harm me (guns, knives, etc. excluded). So, how about it, guys: What do you think? Is it ok for a man to hit a woman who hit him? HPD
My New Main GF **PICS** Posted on Jan 22, 2008 at 08:25 AM
Well, look and weep, fellow Agematchers...attached are 2 pics of whom I now offically consider my chieftain GF...she's 52, has great legs, hair, and ideally-sized augmented breasts. Oh, and in case you're wondering, she has the sexual appetite of a wild African animal. ;) Life's good. :) HPD
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Why is Having a Six-Pack Such a Big Deal? Posted on Jan 09, 2008 at 12:16 PM
Perhaps you ladies who love a fit man like myself could help me understand something. I've been working very hard on my abs, and although having a six pack has never really been a goal of mine (I?ve awesome blue eyes, great arms, and a firm tush ;) ), the effort and hard work that I have exerted for abs has produced a solid six-pack. I seem to get even more attention from a lot of women at my gym, especially when I wear those Under Armour shirts. At first it used to be primarily because of my biceps. Now, it seems to be my chest and abs. I even get looks from extremely huge/super muscular dudes at my gym when they appear to notice the six pack thing, and I don't get it because ideally I personally wish I were as big and muscular as they. Ladies: What is it about a six pack on a man that seems to be such a big deal, and what does that seem to convey to people? Also (and I'm sure most of you gym regulars may have noticed this as well at your gyms), one of the machines that rarely seems available is the chest machine. There's always someone using it. I wonder why there seems to be such a big deal about a man?s need to have a big chest?
5 Dumb Beliefs (Part 5) Posted on Jul 07, 2007 at 10:14 AM
5. Opposition to Performance-Enhancing Drugs Outrightly opposing drug use is stupid, and that same stupidity pertains to performance-enhancing drugs (PED's). Many people use drugs to empower their lives. Women today, for example, use Botox to look younger; others use fat burners to look thinner. Botox and fat burners are drugs, and the men and women who spend money on them know that such drugs enable one to gain an edge in life: younger and thinner-looking people will most likely attract a richer husband or a more attractive girlfriend or obtain a better-paying job. In addition, drugs like nicotine and caffeine are as American as apple pie. But when it comes to an athlete using PED's to gain in athletic edge, he is considered a cheater, a person who takes the easy way out. BULLS_____T. In 2004, Jose Conseco, a former Major League Baseball star and self-proclaimed steroid pioneer, was panned by fans and critics for his tell-all memoir about MLB players' steroid use. Canseco also proclaimed that proper steroid use leads to better living, and I agree with him; but tell this to your average, chemically enhanced, cigarette-smoking American, and he will immediately declare that steroids are used by cheaters and are dangerous. The truth is, PED's, when used commonsensically and knowledgeably, can dramatically enrich life. I am not ashamed to admit that I have used steroids, and the only side effects I recall are an increased sense of well-being: skyrocketing confidence, power, and strength. I never suffered from the supposed "roid rage," (when you're 6'2, 250 lbs. and extremely confident, who's going to fight you?) and my balls didn't shrink to raisin-size (if you use steroids properly, you'll minimize balls shrinkage). Now, steroids can hurt you if you're not careful. They are nothing to mess around with. But when used properly and knowledgably, steroids, combined with sound nutrition and exercise, are going to help you.
5 Dumb Beliefs (Part 4) Posted on Jul 07, 2007 at 10:12 AM
4. Opposition to the Death Penalty The longer I live, the more I realize how stupid and nonsensical most people are. And those who oppose the death penalty exhibit the zenith level of stupidity and lack of common sense. You know who they are: the religious and/or other zealous knuckleheads protesting outside the prison's perimeter on the eve of an announced electrocution or lethal injection, decrying the alleged inhumane treatment of murderers, rapists, and child molesters. What these protesting idiots fail to realize is that their reasoning is fundamentally flawed. I have no problem accepting the fact that the death penalty is inhumane. So? What's your point? THE DEATH PENALTY IS INHUMANE, AND I DON'T GIVE A S_____T! Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, right? (That's about the only part of the bible that I believe.) Many morons who oppose the death penalty claim that innocent people could be sentenced to death. That's very stupid. The death penalty is a societal tool intended for societal well-being, and every tool that is designed to benefit society is, to some degree, imperfect. The interstate highway system, for example, allows millions of drivers every day to travel cross-country at dangerously accelerated rates of speed. People die on these freeways, but would it make sense to ban freeways just because a relatively few individuals die traveling them? How stupid would that be! Same goes for the death penalty: an innocent person's being sentenced to death does NOT mean that we should ban the DP. (By the way, not a single person expired via the death penalty was EVER proven innocent---not one.) Again, the DP is beneficial for society: it ensures that murderers will incur serious consequences for their chosen acts. After all, the ultimate sin deserves the ultimate penalty, right? Makes sense to me. Too bad it doesn't make sense to everyone.
5 Dumb Beliefs (Part 3) Posted on Jul 07, 2007 at 10:10 AM
3. Belief in God To me, believing in God definitely represents the dumbest belief EVER. I cannot believe that so many people ignorantly cling to a belief in god despite the fact that all religions lack logic or proof and continually beget most of the world's most serious problems. Logic means the same thing as common sense, and when it comes to religion, people lack logic. thus, to use the words of Mark Twain "Their common sense ain't so common." In most every aspect of life, we humans utilize logic in order to make sense of or believe in something. Hell, we DEMAND logic: it is illogical to pay $20,000 for an average run-of-the-mill, used Ford Taurus, right? However, when it comes to religion, logic is thrown out the window! Despite having never seen this supposed god, despite having lived in such a miserable and violent world, a person clings to the childlike belief that in somewhere in heaven exists an all-knowing, all-understanding, loving omnipotent higher being. Call me crazy, but believing and storing faith in something you cannot see, smell, feel, touch, or hear is very illogical! Moreover, it really bemuses me that someone believes in god despite the fact that neither he nor anyone else has ever PROVED that such a god exists. And when someone does proclaim that he has literally seen god, society labels him insane--and rightfully so! Such a person is crazy. Imagine in today's time a woman who gives birth reporting that she is a virgin. How f_____n stupid is that! LOL. Who would believe that? And if religion's lacking common sense and proof isn't bad enough, remember that religion is basically the reason for today's most serious problem: war. Despite lacking any logic or having never proved the existence of thier god, people very stupidly are willing to die for their god in the name of religion. D-U-M-B.
5 Dumb Beliefs (Part 2) Posted on Jul 07, 2007 at 10:10 AM
2. Bilingualism Americans mindlessly accepting bilingualism is definitely asinine. We ***** and complain about the Mexicans illegally entering our country, yet we Americans do absolutely nothing to prevent the ease with which Mexicans are able to continue speaking Spanish. If these illegal immigrants (aka "the Mexicans") were discouraged from speaking their native language, they most likely would learn to habla English QUICKLY. But greedy corporations have bowed to bilingualism and have thus made it virtually effortless for Mexicans to assimilate the American language. And not one American says a DAMN THING ABOUT IT. Haven't you ever wondered why so many American corporations' products feature directions that are spoken or written in Spanish? Is it because they're concerned about Mexicans? Companies feature Spanish for one reason: GREED: the more customers, the more money. It does not matter that they cannot speak a word of English. Banks are a prime example of espousing bilingualism to maximize profit. Nearly all ATM's I use and 800 numbers I dial these days feature directions for Spanish-speaking individuals. WHY? GREED. My former employer, Bank of America, pays 10% extra for bilingual-speaking associates. That's BULLS____T. I propose a law banning bilingualism. I understand Mexican's wanting to leave their native hellhole of a country, but if you're going to become an American, you should learn to speak English, hombre.
5 Dumb Beliefs (Part 1) Posted on Jul 07, 2007 at 10:08 AM
1. Terrorism Although I do not support suicide bombers, I refuse to regard them as the mindless, evil, hate-filled killing machines, the "evildoers," as George Bush II would have you believe. I think that many of today's so-called "terrorists" are simply fighting for what they believe, but their one major wrongdoing is they happen to be retailiating against Americans. Thus, the word terrorism is misinterpreted. After all, we Americans terrorize, but we simply manipulate into a "discovery" "democracy." LOL. The fact is, America is a nation filled with individuals who have pioneered a history of violence, aka, terrorism. Columbus supposedly "discovered" America, but records exist of some heavy-duty terrorism exercised by his group of "discoverers" upon Native Americans, spefically rape, murder, and torture. Pick any American decade, and you will quickly discover that its past, present, and future are, in fact, filled with terrorists: slave-owners (including the Founding Fathers), KKK, Mafia, etc. The only difference, in my mind, between, say, the Mafia and the 9-11 "terrorists" is that we Americans glorify certain of types of evildoers. The Sopranos, for example, is one of the most popular American television shows. Millions of Americans sit in the front of their televisions watching "Mafia members" (terrorists) kill and torture people. How American! LOL Since so many Americans are willing to glorify terrorism in the form of The Sopranos, why not glorify terrorism in its purest form? I am going to pilot a television show glorifying terrorism, and I hope that you violence-loving Americans dig it. My show, entitled The Muhammeds, is about a guy named Omar Muhammed, your average-loving-family-man terrorist who balances raising a family and plotting the next big suicide bombing. LOL.
10 Most Asinine American Events, Entities, and Novelties Posted on Jun 09, 2007 at 08:28 AM
10 Most Asinine American Events, Entities, and Novelties Undoubtedly, America has bore its share of some truly significant inventions. However, America also often reflects the zenith of cultural idiocy, so I’ve outlined 10 of the dumbest things that I consider to have ever originated from our great land. 10. Man Lands on the Moon. It baffles me that an estimated half billion people worldwide watched a man land on the moon on July 21, 1969, for the lunar landing is clearly one of the dumbest and overrated expenditures in the history of mankind; it cost us taxpayers billions, and for what? Well, according to President John Kennedy: "The only justification for [the cost] is because we hope to beat [the USSR] to demonstrate that instead of being behind by a couple of years, by God, we passed them." Hmmm…ok; so I paid for a political pissing contest? So much for man landing on the moon; it was a huge waste of time and money and has to be ranked as one of the most asinine, insignificant events—ever. 9. Audience Epitomizes Sarah Jessica Parker as a Sex Symbol Look, SJP is not a bad-looking gal, but to me, she’s far from sexy, so I find it hard to believe that the show in which she starred, __Sex in the City__, became so successful and that she came to symbolize a down-home, girl-next-door sex goddess. I mean, her body is not bad, but her FACE: I swear, her face more resembles Mr. Ed (the horse) than a bona fide sex symbol’s. Moreover, in the show, she smokes incessantly…since when is smoking cigarettes sexy? I thought that died out after Rocky in 1976! 8. Women Embraced in the Workplace I know I’ll be condemned for this one, but I don’t care. Women began entering the workplace in droves some twenty years ago, but I ak you this: What good has come of it? One thing’s for sure: child obesity has skyrocketed ever since women began entering the workplace. Why? The answer’s obvious: Stressed-out moms often don’t feel like taking the time to cook healthy meals for their children, so they stop by the drive thru and order McD’s. (By the way, I waste no time asking a woman whom I am interested in if she cooks; they usually answer no.) If you don’t think that women in the workplace have directly contributed to the child obesity epidemic, just ask Dr. Sunjay Gupta, the highly-regarded and regularly-featured physician on CNN. He ran an article a few months ago questioning the possibility that working women are directly responsible for today’s fat kids. As they say, truth often originates from blasphemy. 7. The Autograph As if celebrity worship weren’t bad enough, the autograph has to be one of the dumbest and most asinine American novelties ever. Boston Celtics legendary star Larry Bird is one athlete whom I particularly admire for chiding autograph seekers; he implored fans to ask for their dad’s autograph rather than his own superstar athlete’s signature. I mean, do you really think an athlete or celebrity gives a crap about you? Why would you want his or her stupid signature? Why would you pay for it? LOL… I prefer 7’6” Wilt Chamberlain’s style; allegedly, fans or autograph seekers would often approach him and ask, “How’s the weather up there?” Wilt would often reply, “It’s raining,” and he would then spit on the fan. THAT’s how most professional athletes and celebrities regard their fans, and I don’t blame them. 10 years ago, a friend of mine mistakenly told me that he obtained OJ Simpson’s autograph. I immediately went in on him: “What? Are you a freaking moron? Don’t you see that that this man is a murderer? Where the hell’s your sympathy? Why don’t you ask for your dad’s autograph?” He never again discussed the concept of autographs with me, for I am one shrewd and ruthless SOB when it comes to exposing the utter stupidity of the autograph. If I ever have children, I will NEVER allow them to seek an autograph in my presence. 6. Chicago Cubs Sell Out Yet Another Home Game I share a paradoxical perspective of Cubs fans. On the one hand, they’re loyal as all get out. On the other, they’re stupid as all get out. This baseball club hasn’t won a world series in nearly a century, and its only consistency is that, decade after decade, it produces losing seasons. Yet, year after year, Cubs fans faithfully pack Wrigley Field. Each home game seems a sell out. Amazing. And Cubs fans wonder why their team is a perennial loser. Why in the hell would the organization aspire to be great when its fans embrace it for being losers? I thought it was really amusing the year that the Cubs actually went to the NLCS and lost to the Florida Marlins in 7 games. Everyone in Chicago seemed to blame the fan for the game 6 loss. Excuse me? If I were that fan, I would be very pissed. Such fans have supported that mediocre team for decades, and now you’re going to blame the fans for the players’ choking in the series? 5. Clothing Manufacturers Embroider Logos, and Consumers proudly Wear Them. I often question terrorist's motives for slamming planes into the WTC towers, but I kind of understand their hatred for Americans, especially when you start to realize how stupid many of us are. I cannot believe how many people stupidly embrace “designer” clothiers’ logos. I advertise for NO ONE, and that includes shirts, hats, and pants. In fact, I buy most of my clothes at the Salvation Army. I let my physique speak for itself, for if you're built well, you do not need clothes to make you look good. Besides, if a company wants me to advertise its product, the company should pay ME; yet, Americans gladly pay an exorbitant dollar and cent to advertise a clothing company's logo...Why do people believe that a shirt bearing the logo of a horse and jockey makes them more important? Dumb! 4. Lawmakers Enact Hate Crimes Hate Crimes are the dumbest and most asinine laws ever; they simply reinforce the concept that blacks and gays are different and should be treated differently. Thus, these laws are inherently discriminatory, but the majority of Americans seem to support them. 3. Coca Cola Introduces a New Formula Executives at Coke are still kicking their own asses own for this one. How stupid! Why fix something which isn’t broken? The reason Coca Cola introduced a new formula was greed, pure and simple. 2. _______________ Goes International I love when it when your average American gets excited about a company or organization’s going international. Teams from the National Football League, for example, began playing games around the globe—Japan, Mexico, etc. OK. Why should I be thrilled about this? Why should I share in a corporate mogul’s greed? And, yes, like Coco-Cola introducing a new and improved formula, ______ going international comes down to greed, pure and simple. 1. The Constitution OK, I know you will likely disagree with me on this one, but it’s true: The Constitution is the most asininely celebrated American entity ever. It’s amazing how minimally Americans really understand the Constitution. For example, how many times is the word “privacy” mentioned in the Constitution? If you guessed more than 1, you’re wrong, and, like 99.9 per cent of Americans, you need to sit down a few hours and actually READ the damn document. It’s baffling that the majority of Americans so highly regard the Constitution. We blindly devote ourselves to it; we regard it as literary perfection, as if God himself wrote it. The truth, however, is that the Constitution rarely lives up to the ideological hype it espouses. Just ask any black man. After all, it took 100 years for lawmakers to amend slavery. But ask any American why he cherishes this document, and he’ll likely respond that the Constitution guarantees us rights. Suuuure. The truth is, you have no guaranteed rights. The feds can arrest you for whatever it feels like, proving that the Constitution is mere ideological fodder for the disillusioned mass; America’s sordid past and present prove it.
Confessions of a MILFlover Posted on May 31, 2007 at 07:20 AM
Of all the little fetishes I have, I cannot get over how completely struck I am by good looking women in their 40's and 50's. Shouldn't this be counter to evolution, since the woman is out of her "prime childrearing years"? Maybe subconsciously I do not want children; perhaps that is why I go for this type (even if she has children). Maybe it's the level of maturity I can't seem to find in the vast majority of 24-year-olds. Maybe it's the fact that she took care of herself so well during her 20's and 30's and now she still looks amazing in her 40's or 50's. Maybe what turns me on is that she might look amazing well into 60's (is that even likely??) Maybe it's the fact that she has her own job and can afford the boob job that I often fantasize about. Maybe it's the fact that her sex drive is equal or even greater than my own. Maybe it's the fact that the older ones are better in the sack than the younger ones. Maybe it's because newly divorced women automatically go into 'Party girl' mode immediately after a divorce. (I see them all over the clubs/bars here. It is somewhat funny; they try to make up for lost party time. These are the easiest for sure.) *** I like to think of this fetish as a healthy one. Any other men have this fetish to the extreme extent that I do? Besides FL, CA and NYC probably have a huge density of MILF-type women.
On aMErican Women and Diamond$ Posted on May 19, 2007 at 07:54 AM
"Only a fool or a lunatic would invest in diamonds." --Edward Jay Epstein MYTH: Diamonds mean love TRUTH: Diamonds mean money to a South African cartel I recently purchased a copy of acclaimed ABC news journalist John Stossel's book Myths, Lies, and Downright Stupidity: Get Out the Shovel: Why Everything You Know is Wrong (Hyperion, 2006, $14.95). Though I don't agree with everything he writes, the author does an admirable job in exposing sensationalist media motives and dispelling some long-held myths and beliefs held dear to many Americans, particularly about Diamond$. Following is an expurgated version of Stossel's text, which I have provided as an educational tool to convey the utter myth and stupidity of buying an expensive diamond ring. Men and women take notice! (text follows) "When American [women] think about diamonds, they think about love. Seventy percent of American men who propose give their bride a diamond engagement ring. Diamond jewelry has come to symbolize love. We also think of diamonds as valuable investments, valuable because they are so rare. But we think those things because we've been conned. Diamonds only mean love, and cost more than gold, because one brilliant company convinced people that diamonds are special. The marketing strategy was born a hundred years ago in the mines of South Africa, when huge deposits of diamonds were found, deposits so rich that miners could practially just scoop the diamonds out of open pits. With the South African discovery, diamonds were suddenly ordinary. Prices plunged. Then a smart Englishman, Cecil Rhodes, bought lots of the suddenly cheap diamond mines, and established a monopoly on the diamond supply. Since people were becoming aware that diamonds were really as common as cheaper gems, De Beers might have been stuck with a huge stockpile of diamonds that nobody wanted, [but] De Beers played the market brilliantly. It launched an advertising and public relations campaign to manipulate the world into believing that diamonds were the proper way to express love, "and they succeeded; they created the marriage market," says author Edward Jay Epstein, who wrote a book about the diamond monopoly and how De Beers conquered American men. Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend became a Hollywood anthem. Diamond sales boomed. De Beers convinced women to covet diamonds, even though other rocks are just as pretty. I ran a test. I borrowed a big diamond worth $65,000 and a piece of cubic zirconium worth less than a hundred dollars. Could people tell the difference? No. At jewelry stores where couples were shopping for diamond rings, people had no idea which one was the real diamond. One bride told me, "It's just sickening, that's what it is, sickening." Could jewelers tell the difference? No. You cannot tell just by looking. One jeweler was convinced both were fakes. At the Gemological Institute of America, the director of grading showed me how THEY have to use machines to test for fakes. I told him I should go on TV and tell people to buy a fake, since even jewelers cannot tell the difference. He said, "Down deep inside, you know you don't have the real thing, and that's the most important point." Get the shovel. If people can't see a difference, the diamond cartel has pulled off a scam. At least diamonds are a good investment, right? That's what people think. But also that is a myth. I ran another test. I borrowed my assistant's diamond ring, which three jewelers said was worth $2400.00. Then we took it to twenty jewelers, saying we wanted to sell it. One of these jewelers admitted you're likely to lose money if you sell a diamond because the mark-up is at least 100 percent. STOSSEL: If a brought this ring to you and I said I want to sell it, what'll you give me in cash? JEWELER: Probably in the area of eleven to twelve hundred dollars. STOSSEL: So half what I might have bought it for retail. JEWELER: It could even be less than that. STOSSEL: I shouldn't buy something like this for investment. It's foolish. JEWELER: I'm not saying you should. STOSSEL: People do all the time. JEWELER: We are all ignorant, only about different things." *** Ladies and gentlmen, the diamond industry makes money off our ignorance. Diamonds may be a girl's best friend, but they're a dubious investment, so the next time you consider buying a diamond, buy her a cubic zerconium; she won't know the difference, and her friends will still be wowed (which is the REAL reason most women love diamonds anyway: social worth).
Advice to Young Men from an Old Man Posted on May 15, 2007 at 07:35 AM
Espi's Note: The following words are not mine, and despite a brief Internet search, I am unable to credit the name of the author. However, felt this was worth posting. Read entirely. You won't be dissapointed. *** 1. Don't pick on the weak. It's immoral. Don't antagonize the strong without cause; its stupid. 2. Don't hate women. It's a waste of time 3. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self-actualized. 4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose. 5. As a former Marine, take it from me: Don't join the military, unless you want to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people's economic or political interests. 6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that the proponent's intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter what bull%%!# they try to feed you. 7. Don't take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is probably closer to 97%, but I don't want to come off as cynical. 8. You'll spend your entire life listening to people tell you how much you owe them. You don't owe the vast majority of people %%!#. 9. Don't undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men who come after you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most powerful force in society, and it scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. 10. As a young man, you're on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women's Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups), almost no one is looking out for you. 11. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look at the Silicone Valley. By in large, not old men or women created the revolution in which we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures it with its intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and rewards when none are due. 12. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does. Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side. Everybody else worries about himself or herself. 13. Don't be afraid to tell people to ?*!%* off when need be. It is an important skill to acquire. Speak your piece, even if your voice shakes. 14. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read body language and non-verbal communication. Don't just concentrate on your vocational or technical skills, or you'll find your wife *!%*ing somebody else. 15. Keep fit. 16. Don't speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even if she's wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your help, give it. She should know that you'll take her part. 17. If your girlfriend doesn't make you feel good about yourself and bring joy to your life, fire her. That's what girlfriends are for. 18. Don't bother with emotional affairs. They are just a vehicle for women to flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That is the part of a relationship that women want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If they are having an emotional affair with you, they?re probably *!%*ing someone else. 19. Becoming a woman's friend and confidant is not going to get you into an intimate relationship. If you haven't gotten the girl within a reasonably short period of time, chances are you won't ever get her. She'll end up confiding to you about the sexual adventures she's having with someone else. 20. Have and nurture friendships with women. 21. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You're going to see some girl and feel like you'll die if you don't get her. If she rejects you, move on to the next one. It's her loss. 22. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will give you "the look." Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the worst time. Don't get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business. Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their existence. 23. Don't gay bash. Don't mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are or how they present themselves. It is none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity. 24. Remember: 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash the rest.
On Marcuse, America, and Demise Posted on Apr 21, 2007 at 11:49 AM
"We advocate the responsible and legal use of firearms and are saddened that there are some who will pick up a firearm with the intention of harming an innocent human being." (i.e. the source from which 23-year-old Cho Seung-Hui, recently hospitalized for depression, legally purchased a 9 mm handgun via the Internet and used it to slaughter 32 Virginia Tech students and faculty members. "Hand guns are made for killin', they ain't no good for nothin' else. And if you like to drink your whiskey you might even shoot yourself. So why don't we dump 'em people to the bottom of the sea before some ol' fool come around here, wanna shoot either you or me." --Lynyrd Skynyrd Saturday Night Special "All the children are insane" --Jim Morrison The End "The times they are a-changin" --Bob Dylan Recently, I proclaimed that America would be extinct within the century, and, as most Americans seem to be doing these days, I am sticking to my guns (pun intended). Most Americans think our country could not possibly be felled, but remember that all empires come and go, and the twin towers took 10 years to build and less than 2 hours to collapse. Ask any American today about the future of his country, and his likely response is that the social and political structure of his beloved America nation has rotted to such an incorrigible level that he chooses to ignore the inevitable demise, the inevitable American tower collapse. Yes, the social and political American system is bankrupt. It is nothing, baby. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Most will agree with me. Community and morals have taken a backseat to the vicarious pursuits of celebrity and materialism, and no one seems to trust his neighbor or politician. Nothing is safe in America. In my mind, America is 66% extinct (social 33%; poltical 33% economical 33%). America is no longer America. The final 33 % decline of America will manifest in an economic breakdown. In his 1964 publication One-Dimensional Man, author Herbert Marcuse explores the permeating social dysfunction of Americans? unconditional acceptance to ?existing structures, norms, and behaviors.? Marcuse, who died in 1979, observed that western society?s morbid alliance to surfeit existence and materialism was actually detrimental to the individual?s role of a living a purpose-filled existence. Why? First, Marcuse states that the American power structure has advanced capitalism way beyond the point of Karl Marx? na?ve vision of the oppressed proletariat. We Americans love our t.v., our prozac, our meaningless jobs, our automobiles. But there?s a toll due.: Though Consumption is the new American God and the Mall is the post-modern church, we have alienated perhaps our most important human attribute: the ability to think critically. You see, Marcuse was smart man: He understood that liberal/democratic societies are mere ideological fronts from which the ?haves? control and oppress the ?have-nots.? That?s why most Americans feel powerless. We are reacting rather acting tragedies, to the recent mass-murder school shooting, for example. We have become a mass of dead and bloated, passive consumerists who exist vicariously through American Idols, CNN, and escapist advertisements. Yes, passive people sit around and await orders. Active people get off their ass and manage people, places, and things. Furthermore, Marcuse states that Americans tend to be as irrational as they pretend to be rational. Such irrationality is clearly exemplified in American today. On one level, Americans are willing to pay $150.00 for a pair of name-brand blue jeans (which is just plain dumb), but more significantly, irrationality has inflicted a serious gash on our moral structure. Remember 6 months ago when Fox published O.J. Simpson?s ?pretend? autobiography in which he chronicled the method he?d employ to murder his wife? These days, American irrationality seems to have supassed a heretofore perceived all-time time peak. Desensitization and greed have permeated American society. For example, NBC has no qualms about airing a murderer?s diatribe, and I?ll bet you in 5 years that students enrolling at Virginia Tech will eagerly sign up to inhabit the room of mass murderer Cho Seung-Hui. You watch: I will be proved right about this in 5 years. Such social decline and corruption were clearly prophesized by Jim Morrison, lead singer of The Doors, who 40 years ago predicted that America would resemble "A strange and haunting world?suggestive of a new wild west." Sure sounds like the America in which I live today. Smash your t.v. and fill it with books. Be daring and adventurous in thinking outside the prisonhouse of our reigning ideologies. Crane your necks opposite the direction of the inevitable train wreck.